Time For My Grandmother

2 days ago I was informed by my mom that my grandma's younger sister had passed away. I was not really emotionally affected by this news as I hardly knew her. However, I was worried about how this news would affect my grandma. My mom and my eldest uncle were the ones to break the news to her yesterday.

Just as I have expected, my grandma was terribly upset and shaken by the news. We were all prepared to accompany her to the funeral but she refused to go as she was not emotionally ready for it.

As I thought about this event, I somehow became emotionally disturbed too. I wondered about how I would feel if I'm at my grandma's age and having to see my loved ones around the same age group leave one by one. I would definitely feel lonely and scared at the same time.

This made me realize that I should spend more time with her while I still can. Some people may think old people are naggy and troublesome. But ask yourself this, "Will I be happier if they were gone?". My answer to myself is NO!

I've seen many people who cried their hearts out during funerals regretting about not spending enough time with the deceased and not treating them better. I ask myself this every time, "Did I spend enough quality time with my loved ones, especially the elderly?". 

Our grandparents and parents had spent most of their time with us. But most of us are so reluctant to spend even 5 minutes of our time with them. We as children and grandchildren tend to be impatient with the elderly because we find them talking or nagging too much. So, we snap easily and tried to allocate face time only during festive celebrations (not more than 5 times a year?).

In our current time, we spend most of our time with our gadgets (laptop, smart phones, tablets, playstation, Xbox..etc). I've even seen people sitting in the restaurant, instead of talking with each other while enjoying dinner, they were busy eating while enjoying their gadgets. What made these gadgets become more important than our elderly loved ones?

One of my cousin complained to me about not being able to agree with her father and almost every conversation ends up in a bicker. I may not be right but this is what I told her, "Our parents are getting old and we may not be agreeable with everything that they say. Instead of talking back and hurting their feelings, why not just keep quiet and just let the words pass through from ear to ear? Do you rather have them out of your life permanently? ".

Before I end this post, I would like to share a story with you that touched my heart.

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A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in- law, and four-year old grandson. The old man’s hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together at the table, but the elderly grandfather’ s shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.

The son and daughter-in- law became irritated with the mess. “We must do something about Grandfather, ” said the son. “I’ve had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.” Therefore, the husband and wife set a small table in the corner.

There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl. When the family glanced in Grandfather’s direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.

The four-year-old watched it all in silence. One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, “What are you making?”

Just as sweetly, the boy responded, “Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up.” The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.

The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.

That evening the husband took Grandfather’ s hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days, he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.

Children are remarkably perceptive. Their eyes ever observe, their ears ever listen, and their minds ever process the messages they absorb.

If they see us patiently, provide a happy home atmosphere for family members, they will imitate that attitude for the rest of their lives. The wise parent realizes that every day the building blocks are being laid for the child’s future. Let us be wise builders and role models.

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Why wait until it's too late? 5 minutes may mean nothing to you but it may mean the whole world to them.